A lot of the time when I'm driving home from work, I fantasize about running some chain-link fence across the MD/PA border on Route 15. I figure it would save everyone coming up 270 about 10-15 minutes one-way.
Around here, the only drivers even close to as bad as PA drivers, are Virginia drivers. But that is a topic for another day, perhaps one when VA drivers piss me off this much.
My entire drive to and from work is plagued with not only idiot drivers from Maryland, but a collection of assholes from every other one of the continental US, I also see a lot of Quebec and even a few Hawaii and Alaska. Summer time is bad for this, lots of people on the summer vacation, dumbfucks that default to the left lane because they have no idea where they are and where they are going. But out of all of this, not one single state has drivers as completely blind and retarded as PA.
You see, I'm not the only one that things this way.. I've heard many people bitch about this. What in the FUCK is wrong with you PA people? Why on earth do you get in the left lane, drive either exactly the speed limit or slower, and REFUSE to move right? Today's drive home, which started pretty early in the afternoon, was fucked, totally fucked. Absolutely nothing on earth pisses me off more than being far back in a big chain of cars in the left lane, looking ahead and seeing one worthless piece of shit at the front moving 50mph, no one in front of him/her, and not getting the fuck out of the way for anything. All of the lemmings fall in line and follow.. a few of them, like me, get pissed, start trying to weave through the right lanes for a little chance of getting past.
Now when this happens, and the asshole is not driving a prius, you can almost bank on it being someone with PA tags, or a fucking double whammy, a prius with PA tags ( see previous post for prius rant). Today, I had the pleasure of spending 30 FUCKING MILES stuck in slow moving traffic, the front of this line was a Black Honda Accord, with, you guessed it, PA tags. Now in this mess of cars behind the accord, roughly 30 cars between me and her at first, there were plenty of other PA tagged vehicles, all of which, perfectly ok with going 50mph. I found this out in my journey to the front of the line, the closer I got to the front, the more disgusted I became. A total of 3 PA tagged vehicles in the left lane, over time, each one became its own lead car, spaced out from the next group of cars. I made my way to the rear bumper of every single one, spent about 5 minutes behind each, waiting for the adjacent right lane to open up so they -could- move over.. and nothing.
If there is enough space, I'll give someone about 60 seconds to move right, if theres no signs of it, then I will pass on the right. Now, again, I am not the only person angry with these fools, others much more than I. You would think every single person going around you to the right, then purposely cutting you off would clue the PA drivers in, but no.
Back to queen cunt of shit mountain, the bitch in the accord as I came to think of her. While I had left early, by the time I hit the lane drop on 270 it was getting later into the afternoon, and congestion was growing worse. She continued to refuse to move out of the right, there were still 5 cars between her and I. Every single one of those cars, absolute idiot driving. Thanks to congestion, while there were plenty of opportunities for her to move right, there was not enough room to pass. She continued to twiddle her twat in the left lane until the first exit for Frederick... 30 fucking miles of left lane witchery before she finally, finally moved right. Dumb bitch single handedly took away 10-15 minutes of my life if not more (gets complicated when you start factoring in going faster means being further ahead of the rush hour traffic..).
I was sure to give her a nice round of applause (literally) as I passed her.. I find that gets the point across better than one-finger gestures.
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Today's fuck off and die shoutout goes out to you, state of Maryland. You dumb fucking shit for brain cock sucking morons. 270 is plagued with a few overhead electronic signs, you'd think by now the Maryland state highway administration would have figured out that when you put a blinking message on those boards at rush hour, it causes chaos and panic from every single dumbfuck on the road (basically just about everyone). People slam on their brakes, traffic comes to a stop, rush hour starts 30 minutes earlier because you wanted to say "click it or ticket", and accidents literally happen because of the sudden stops.
What did this sign say today? An alternating - "Don't drive distracted" and "No Texting No handheld devices"
Genius idea.. assholes.
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